Moonlight Midnight Moments


I had a dream about a black wall that was the sky.

Black and spinning around a half smiling moon, it looked into a glass box so big it held a forest, a field and a road inside.

And me.

I had arrived at the end of a long and winding dirt road where I stopped, getting out of my small grey car.

It was cold.

The black and spinning wall was colder. Maybe even more so because I could not pass. Maybe because I was dissapointed that there was even a wall at all. I removed my hand and backed away. Turning I looked around at my dark, giant, enclosed space. The moon seemed to laugh at me as it danced along the tips of leaves and grass and roads leading to nowhere until it reflected more dimly on another, darker wall. The direction I assume I must have come from.

There were four walls. And a top. Dark black glass with a two dimensional grinning moon.

I hated that moon for being able to touch the tips of my world, but not letting me beyond this box. Not even letting me see through the cold glass that kept me in.

But maybe, I thought, just beyond this glass there is something not so dark. Maybe just on the other side, there is SOMETHING.

and as if the moon could read my thoughts, it said no. Only this moon, and the dark.

and in the convicted way of dreams, I believed it.

I glared back at the moon for a long minute.

I asked, just the moon, and the dark?

Yep. Only me, and the dark.

It laughed.

then I said, with the convicted way of dreams,

Then at least there’s no box…..

CHANGING BLOG ADDRESS!

Hey there, I just want everyone to know I'm changing the address to my blog!

The new address will let me put up bigger pictures, wider format etc...

the NEW one..... www.treeandtreasure.blog.com

:)

cheers!

RANT! When does fashion verge on child porn???






SOOO.... today... today im in the mood for a little rant. Its a full moon outside, I broke 3 nails, the skin on my face hurts. But the main, and probably only thing worth ranting about is a casting I had today.

A Lingere casting.

so let me begin.

I arrive with my bikini ready and spirits decent. I had a nice 4 hour break in the middle of the day so had time to grab sushi with Lina and after, spent a nice amount of time in a vintage shop being entertained by a Japanese lady with flaming red lips, who was determined to try to speak french with us. By the time we were being picked up, I was feeling as ready as I could before 5 hours of castings, and even had a bounce in my step as I made my way to my managers car. We knock off a few castings from our list, and then arrive at this one. This casting that I'm sure I at least have a better chance at than the 12 year olds standing across from me. We were beckoned to a designated changing area where we could put on our bikinis. When we were finished we waited. We waited like cattle in a cold room, bare footed, and in torture from each others scrutiny. I cringed as I watched a girl, who could have been no older than 13, grab her pencil-thin thigh and squish it hard between her forefingers, exclaiming to her friends that she still had to "lose" some from here... Of course to which her companions replied "no, your so skinny! look at my _____". I thought it an interesting dynamic, considering they then proceeded to eye up each others and everyone else's, legs tummies and forearms for any traces of fat or flaw. I was nausiated. I sat by my booker wearing at least my leather jacket for a little warmth and modesty. Could I have been the oldest person here? I mean, I'm not even on the older end of the scale as far as modeling in goes. In fact I can only recently drink alcohal legally. As I watched these girls bouncing their giddy energy around the room, I was sure it would be at LEAST half a decade before any of them could. Both me and one other girl who had also hit puberty waited quietly with our jackets and our managers.

One by one we went in. I was waiting in the doorway with my manager as the girl before me took her place in front of the judging panel, her manager attempting to sell her to the clients with her portfolio and information. They eyed her up. They eyed her down. She hadn't any waist. She hadn't ANY breasts... And she most certainly didn't have any hips. She did have hip bones though, and some ribs, and even a cute little baby face and slight pot-belly to match. Me and my manager exchanged a glance. She was a baby! A half starved baby at that! We were sure the client would smile politely, hand her her portfolio, and send her on her way with a big mac and a story book.

And just as I was imagining this little scenario, the client said, "Prease try somesing on".

WHAATTT!??? ( this was loudly in my head, I did not in fact shout this)

My manager and I exchanged another look, this time with cocked eyebrows. We waited. She bounced across the room to the other changing area, and back again. Every japanese male with in eye-shot was looking at her. This is of course normal for castings to have groups of people all looking at you, but something is weird when a little girl, obviously lying about her age, wiggles across a room in lingere, while tossing her hair here and there for some extra flare. And knowing that there's a line up in the room over of a bunch of little girls waiting to do the same.

I went in. I came out.

I didn't mind much, because lingere isn't really my strong suit, and I'm pretty sure my tatoo would have gotten in the way anyhow.I Had hardly put on my t-shirt though before 3 other girls around my age had gone in and come out too, having not been asked to try anything on. Surprisingly the only girls who had more than an AA cup. I guess they WANT children. or people who look young anyway. But c'mon!

I BET THEY HAVE BARBIES AND PONIES IN THEIR APARTMENTS WAITING FOR THEM TO COME HOME AND HAVE A TEA PARTY WITH THEM!....... or they're from really bad home lives, or need to support an entire family, or got in the drug scene at 11....

But when should the line be drawn? When should the managers and agencies of these young girls put morale in front of money? When will clients learn how to create their "image" more appropriately for their target market, by using real women for lingere instead of sticking a Nu-Bra of a 12 year old? Let me tell you about a little thing called photoshop. If you can put makeup on, and photoshop a prepubescent girl into looking like she 25, why not spare her her childhood and photoshop another beautiful woman to suit the image. Its not hard. Happens all the time. Pimples, gone. Birthmarks, gone. That little piece of thigh you might not like? well, thats gone too. But I think there isn't enough emphasis on age in the modeling industry. It does make one grow up fast, and lets face it, standing in underwear in front of an entire room of strangers trying to look cute as people search for your flaws is hardly anything most individuals have to go through in a lifetime.
For many girls, they come into the industry when they are most impressionable, so teaching them early on that they are objects of desire, and can make money from it... well, how will they learn to grow more as individuals if thats all they're taught they're worth? Im lucky I started at 17... Many start at 12 and 13. What were you like at 12 and 13?

And then leaving the building, my manager, the wonderful Taka, chased away a group of Japanese men who had gathered to sneak a peak through the partially curtained window.

And we wonder why we have pedophiles.

...

MY BELOVED VINTAGE JACKET!



THIS is definitely a treasure I've come across. I actually went on a mission so that i could get it. Let me tell you... trying to find a bank that accepts foreign bank cards is A LOT more difficult in tokyo than one might think. Lina and I searched for over 40 minutes asking anyone who looked like they might speak english, (or have skills with sharades), where we could find a Citi bank. Damn stores that only take cash! Anyway, we got it just on time before the store closed. SO lucky <3


I met a new friend today. His name is Hulk Hogan. And he is pretty rad. Especially because he's made of cardboard... and is missing body parts.

Anyway this is the sweater I found at a flee market, and I'm kind of in love with it. it reminds me a bit of Pendleton meets Opening Ceremony. Check out the above pic and lemme' know if you agree :)

Personal Paradigms




Here are a few of my sketches.

sometimes I get bored of drawing pretty things.

Sometimes I just really like to draw circles.

... Anyway, I'm off to bed. I have to be up at 5am tomorrow to get a 6:00 am train to Osaka for a wonderful 10 hour day :).... *_*

Cheers.

Adventures with my friend Insomnia


So for no distinguishable reason, I was awake for a total of 49.5 hours.

Its not that I was galavanting around tokyo on a massive two-day party-binge, which would have been at least a more exciting excuse, it was just that my head wouldn't shut the eff up, and my bed refused to let me look at it. Sorry to disappoint, but thats the truth. My random moments of insomnia sometimes sneak up on me during the most inconvenient of times. Sometimes when I have work the next day... And i did.

I had a shoot for an editorial, which went well and finished early. After, I met with my friend Lina for dinner and a drink. And after that... the rest of the night was spent drawing, reading, emailing, Facebook stalking, watching movies, blogging, googling, organizing, and counting anything countable to try and make myself tired. But my constantly bouncing knee, and disappearing supply of Sleepy Time tea was mocking my attempts. And then I could hear morning; the clacking of heals and stiff business shoes of the pavement. The growing hum of cars. The cackling of crows. I hate crows. Hearing them in the morning, and being in Japan while I do reminded me of the last time I tried to watch the movie The Grudge. BAD idea to watch a scary movie based in Japan while in japan. Now I kept imagining a greasy, incredibly flexible japanese girl climbing out of my ceiling to kill me. I put on my most calming playlist and listened to it until my alarm eventually went off. I was showered, dried off, and dressed with more time to kill before my call time, so embarked on a walk.

People filed quietly and efficiently towards their morning destinations. An eery sight with so many silent black haired people. The occasional face mask didn't help. Nor did the fact that nearly every one held eye contact with me. I guess I shouldn't be so surprised, because Im the one who's out of place being light haired, blue eyed, and about a foot taller than most Japanese. I decided to head in the direction of a park hoping there'd be less people, and I could hopefully stop thinking about movies like Dawn of the Dead. When I got there, there was a flee market! A nice surprise for me because I love flee markets. Im always keeping an eye open for fantastic vintage clothes, so I began to feel better. Though it was still filled with people, this time there was chatter, laughter, and even the occasional tourist. I decided I'd spend some time here, and set my alarm to remind me when i had to leave.

Searching through racks, baskets, and displays on the ground of old clothes, I found a few fantastic pieces! I found a black dress from the 80's, with insane shoulder pads and incredible draping and cinched waist that reminds me a bit of Balmain, and Dries Van Noten. I also found a big sweater that isn't dissimilar to the jackets and sweaters done by Pendleton for Opening Ceremony. SCORE! I just saved thousands of dollars if I think about it... and this is why i love vintage shopping. Not to mention the awesome vintage leather jacket I recently discovered.
I think I'll make another post with pictures and comparisons to the real-deals...

Anyhoo, my alarm had been going off for about 5 minutes before I realized it, and I booked it back to my apartment just in time to get picked up by Rolly, one of my managers. Heading to work on no sleep, I was still able to present a happy mood and good attitude. I was feeling pretty damn good after my little early morning discoveries anyway, so it helped. The time would have passed faster I think if I wasn't working alongside a male model who was determined to talk about him self, only himself, and to himself if no one was listening. I now know that he's German, likes skateboarding, listens to old rock, smokes a lot of weed, but not in tokyo because you can go to prison, dated Chanel Iman briefly about three years ago, likes to snowboard in his free time, has a girlfriend who is a professional horseback rider, knows where there's an awesome massage parlor in Rapongi, shot three campaigns in his first year modeling, started when he was 16, didn't finish high school, has a mom who's a psychiatrist, and a dad who's a teacher.

I very much doubt he knows that my eye colour is blue, and that my first language is english.

Not that I'm not conversational, but usually the other person should appear remotely interested in knowing something about me if I'm going to volunteer information. Im glad I had my Nintendo DS for company.

After I finished the shoot, it was off to 9 castings. THATS NINE CASTINGS. This was turning into the longest day ever! Im lucky I ran into Lina at a few of them, and she helped me keep my sanity. Exchanging stories and laughing about how long the day was was all we could do. Each casting seemed to be full of girls, and the wait was usually long. I told her about my vintage finds, and we made plans to go hunting again maybe the next day. Thats if I could actually sleep though! We decided that Since she was working tomorrow until about four anyhow, I'd definitely get enough sleep in by then. I was starting to feel exhausted, and had high hopes.

I got home at about 10 pm. I was still pretty alert, so popped off a few emails and messages. Then updated my ipod. Then took another shower. Then had a Sleepy Time tea. Then read a little. Then drew a little. Then watched a movie... wtf! Couldn't sleep at all! I layed in bed for about 2 hours staring at my ceiling, then playing Nintendo when my eyes couldn't take it any more. When I realized that sitting in my room wouldn't help me get sleepy, I got up and decided to head over to Don Quy Hote, the 24 hour store that sells everything international and otherwise. Thank god for 24 hour shops! even if i don't buy anything, at least it gives me something do do during periods of jet-lag and insomnia. Scouring the three floors I managed to get only one memory stick. I was quite impressed with myself for not also getting new headphones, nail polish, hair crimper, and groceries.
Plus one point for "Elyses-money-saving-plan"
I headed back to my apartment grudgingly. No Starbucks was even open yet. I would have welcomed the sound of crows by now if only it meant that I'd have somewhere to occupy myself! But no. It was still dark. People were grogily walking home drunk from a full night of drinking, and some people were even getting on their way to work. Sometimes, a person could be seen in a full suit going to work drunk form the night before! There is no other kind of alchohalism like that which can be found in Tokyo. Probably no other type of insomnia either. I've worked with a few clients who've admitted to getting about 2-3 hours sleep on a regular basis. 6 hours is sleeping in. Maybe on some messed up subconcious level I'm just trying to blend in with the culture. But c'mon! It's been over a day and a half! Certainly no sane person, Japanese or not, can be awake that long without the help of non-human chemicals. This makes me wonder what the hell kind of chemicals do I have? Perhaps its my anxiety. Perhaps its just the wine from dinner. Perhaps wondering about it wont make the situation any better, and I should just lay back down in bed again. But my bed wouldn't have it. Every position was uncomfortable, my blankets seemed itchy, and my pillow lumpy. What really sucks was that my body was actually so tired! I think that I was even shaking a bit. I took a long hot shower for the second time to try and relax more. The stress that all this wakefulness was putting on my body eventually lead to me breaking down and crying. My brain was screaming at me, and my body was sulking until eventually, I fell into a dreamless sleep.

49.5 hours.
49.5 hours I was awake. And it was only 5.5 hours before my natural clock woke me up again, relentlessly, just in time to receive a phone call from Lina reminding me what we were meeting at Starbucks in half an hour.

I suppose this would be some type of addition to my tree. Some type of self discovery. Some growth. Some adventure. Being in a weird state of mind where your tired, exhausted even, but with nothing you can do about it, can cause you to look at the world in a in a different light. A changed perception. The surreal angle from a sleepless mind.

At least I have something to write about.

cheers.



Passing the fantabulous Chanel store in Omote-sando, Lina sneaked a shot. I figure why not. Was a nice day any how :P

... which reminds me, its a national holiday here in Japan on this monday, and finally experiencing an entire day free of shoots and/or castings, should be taking advantage of the insanely kick-ass vintage shopping here! Having been blessed with the worst insomnia know to man, and showing no signs of giving in until at LEAST the 48th hour of my wakefulness, nearly forgot. I have a lot of things I want to do today. Searching for amazing vintage is one of them. The other you ask?

find sleeping pills...

... among other things.

So good night or good morning depending on where you are, I'm off to the city streets!

cheers.

SO EXCITED!!!!

In this pic is a few of my friends, and my sister (the cheeky blonde) just before going out to celebrate my birthday at the end of october. I had the best, and surprisingly most surreal birthday ever, and didn't sleep until at least 8:30am for an hour before heading out for french toast. After all, my ACTUAL birthday wasn't until then anyhow...

...Oh, the power of redbull, 5-hour energy drinks, and 5am cappuccinos.

ANYWAY, I'm getting distracted from my point! My sister Melanie did a lot for me for my birthday, and though plagued with exhaustion early in the evening, she went home, I was still so excited that we could spend my birthday together. Its becoming less and less often that I get to see my other half, and even birthdays are a hard bargain. Though Mel came and toughed it out with my birthday, I missed hers. Only two weeks after mine, I had already left my home town in Canada, flown back to my home in New York, Packed my bags and was in Tokyo putting on my yellow suede LouBoutins for castings before I could even blow a kiss goodbye. I missed Mel already! ... and miss her right now as I write this...

But the EXCITING part of all this is that SHE'S COMING TO TOKYO!!! I was able to book her a flight for the 14th of December, and we'll be on the flight back together. I'm SO excited.

If there's anything I've always wanted to be able to do, it's to share my experiences with travel with my fam'. Hopefully her first time in Tokyo is as amazing as it should be.

If she can get around her general disgust for raw fish, that'd be a good start ;)

Another leaf for my tree,

^_^

hmmm....

All i have to say... is only in japan

Exploring Tokyo, and Finding Gems

Exploring the streets of Tokyo with my Swedish friend Lina, we came across the coolest place! At first glance what seemed to be a heavily graffitied shack, turned out to be an underground art gallery and monjayaki restaurant. Here the younger (and in my opinion, cooler) Japanese come to hang out, look at the crazy, sometimes awesome, and sometimes terrible art and photography covering the inside of this building. There's everything from illustrations, to hand made crafts and nick-naks, to artistic photography, a lot of which is for sale. And when your done scanning the walls of the many entrancing rooms, or perhaps before, there's a restaurant in the back under tents and trees and planks of wood. Here people are found gathered with their friends around tables which are almost entirely made of a giant hot-plate (minus a few spare inches around the ledge). Here you simply get a bowl of ingredients, and cook your own food! .... and its so strange and interesting how. When we first ordered, we weren't sure we were doing it right because it looked like puke. When we asked about it, it turns out we were doing fine. It does look like puke. BUT it tasted pretty damn good anyhow... And they have crazy-awesome drink specials at lunch time ;)
One of the most surreal buildings I've come across, and well worth the visit.

This is definitely added to my treasure

:)



To get a look at the insane Tokyo street style, you should check out my friend Lina's Blog:

http://linadimoda.freshnet.se

Thoughts of Lines and Ladders

So letting my mind run, and my hand do what it wanted, i ended up with this. What do you take from it? knowing no one will see it quite the same way, I'm curious to know.

To Dream a Dream

I know its girly, but i did in fact have a dream involving fairies and monsters. Ever since i was a kid, I've had vivid dreams with characters, and plot lines.
In this particular dream, I was a character plagued by nightmarish monsters. I knew I was in a dream, and that the monsters after me were from my nightmares, but there seemed like there was nothing i could do about it but run. So I did. Running through the night time landscapes in my head of forest and field, I came across a friend whom i recognized from my other dreams. She told me that she was having the same problem with these bloody nightmare monsters chasing her around, and completely ruining a dream she was in involving mass amounts of ice cream. she was as pissed off as I was that this "lucid dreaming" had stupid monsters in it. we started to brainstorm for ideas. We both tried to wake up, but couldn't. Every branch we picked up for protection seemed to protest at the idea of touching monsters, and shriveled up. Every place we tried to hide was always too small once we got there. we were about ready to give up and just see what horrible stuff would happen next just to get it over and done with. And then we saw someone else. or something else. Some giant, fat, genderless being with sticks for hair, auburn skin and red eyes wobbled over in our direction. We then realized how small we were. We'd have no escape if this were a monster at last, but in the way of dreams, I knew it was not. It said that this dream was indeed having problems with monsters, and knew where we could go to fix it before it was over. It told me and my friend to hurry along, because we had to meet them there within the hour. "go where, who are we meeting?" I said. "better not be taking us to those monsters mann, I've had enough of this! I'd rather be awake if you could do that instead"
Turning around, the Creature said, "no you idiot, you'd be tortured or dead and awake in a cold sweat by now if I was in league with the monsters. There's actually two fairies in the middle of this forest that once you meet them, they can help you, and the monsters'll be no more than dust once they get to you... well, for this dream at least. They're not in every dream you see. But anyway, all this explaining is wasting time, and now the monsters are getting closer! So if you don't mind...".
This time we shut up and ran alongside the creature who continued to wobble along at a casual pace. We were both feeling anxious as the enclosing monsters could be heard making their slurping, growling, gnawing, and clawing in the distance. It seemed about 15 minutes or so ( but time is pretty irrelevant in dreams) before we saw the blue and glowing mist in the distance ahead. We ran for it. The monsters were so close by now, we could smell morning breath. Running at full pace, we dived under a shelf of tree roots just under the glow. We peeked out. looking, we could see the two fairies. We could also see all the other dream people and creatures who came here to get protection, or perhaps something else. Either way, somehow the gibberish, and sounds, and almost music that i was hearing in my head let me know that everything would be okay. Sounds were mixing like kindergarten recess, warm and windy summer evenings, and light rain on grass. My anxiety began to lessen. The growling and slurping grew into a loud and strong wind. A wind i could feel warm on me. Then a Breeze. Then it was still. I opened my eyes, not realizing i had closed them.
And there i was in my room. Awake. My window tapping with rain reminded me to close it, and all of my pillows and blankets were in a heap on the floor.

... so then i drew what i saw in my head, and hope to come across them again.

and here i add a leaf to my tree.

My Blog

Hey there everyone, my name is Elyse.

Trees and Treasure is about many different things:
growth, change, creation, random abandon, and life in general (trees), and the many objects and materials that bewitchingly pull us in whatever direction they are, so long as we get to them (treasure).
I have travelled all over the world searching for a nameless treasure that will always be the next street, city, country over, so I suppose I'll be moving until i can't any more. Because always when I think I've found the X, there's another dazzling possibility within eyeshot that I cant resist!

I'm a model with a love of not only fashion, but also with all the randomness in life; drinking cocktails at noon because we've got nothing better to do on a wednesday; partying in Yoyogi park until 5am alongside people who cant speak english, but are eager to play badminton anyhow; being best friends with a person met a day ago, and dancing in the west village streets to a song you sing yourself... the list goes on.

I'm constantly surrounded by the most creative and inspiring people, places, and things, that I feel like sharing them is the best way to express my appreciation for a life, that I sometimes forget, is an amazing one.

triumphs, failures, dreams, nightmares, adventures abroad, and explorations of the soul.

So here i give to you, both my trees, and my treasure.

cheers.